After some indecision, I tried to take up Frank's invitation and... not having a newspaper to mail it to, I put it here
“Dear niece,
since I could never occupy more than an underscore on the acrobatic line of your existence, much less would I want to waste the opportunity to make a mark that you can attach to your collections of names and interpret when the road appears most winding to you.
The world in which I live will perhaps appear to you as a past world, just as the one in which I grew up already seems past to me, and you may believe that the advice of those who lived in circumstances totally dissimilar to those you will find yourself in is of no use. And yours will be a conviction entirely consistent with that which each generation has always nurtured toward those that came before, until it itself becomes the previous generation. However, listen to me: your opinion right now is truly the correct one: you probably live in a different world, of which most of us can have only little awareness and for which we might be completely unsuitable. As you age, do not fall into the errors and the flatteries of memory, which sometimes turns into nostalgia, other times into pure fantasy. And do not fall into the opposite error either, thinking that your present is predestined to create a better future: too many times this hope has become a pretext. Make your present better, as much as you can.
You see, for the human race, current, past, and future reality is like a sumptuous banquet, opulent and vast and full of every delicacy, as well as bitter surprises, but it is laid only once. It does not restock and exhausts its riches as time passes. Those who arrived first were certainly luckier, not necessarily better, because they had a wider choice available to them. Little by little they consumed the tasty foods, those within reach, and little by little the followers were forced to explore distant borders to find something palatable still. Although the feast may appear inexhaustible, in the hope of finding new delights we must push ourselves ever more toward remote extremes and face increasing risks. For this reason, your endeavor will begin with a verse certainly more heroic than mine. However, the rhymes that follow, the story you will want to tell, and the outcome they will have—those will belong to you and you alone, and whether your inner future manifests as dark or serene will depend on your ability to face the present.
Deciphering reality proves to be a demanding task that requires special tools, and many will be those who try to sell you their package of solutions, some in good faith, others in bad. Take them all into consideration, knowing from the start that you will be unable to do without many of them regardless. Do not show yourself to be proud, because pride will not help you, but never give up on discovering the way for yourself, on building your own plow to cultivate your land and your hull to navigate your seas, on writing the songs to lull your children. It will not be easy and it will often make you feel probably alone.
You will dedicate a good part of your life to building the foundations and the pillars of your entire existence. This is the set of rules that from a certain point onward will characterize your game and distinguish your personality from others, the principles that, once consolidated, will be difficult if not impossible for you to transgress: in a word, your morality. You must understand that the fashion in which these columns are built varies, the material is different, the number and arrangement changeable, but unique is the way in which they take shape for any animal endowed with intellect, and such a way is habit. The moment when this set reaches a stable structure is the moment of maturity. The moment when this set ceases to evolve and is no longer able to adapt, that is the moment of old age. However it goes, this system will be indispensable for you to live in the world, and the aspect you have given it will be fundamental to the results you can achieve. Do not, however, mistake the function of habit for a passive attitude, as curiosity, initiative, and all your intelligence will be necessary to perform such an imposing work. You will face choices, you will make mistakes, and you will recalibrate your project until it guarantees you satisfactory answers. Be careful not to let habit become an obstacle; simply exploit it to your advantage, as you will be unable to do without it. It will serve you in every circumstance, from the most insignificant to the most complex, but always be vigilant so that it never compromises your judgment.
Here, precisely this, if I had to bet everything on something, is what I would bet on,”
on your capacity for judgment, which shall be responsible for guiding every action, every decision and your every thought. Learn to exercise it; dedicate to it more care than to any other faculty, always keep it in the foreground without ceasing to focus on it. Ensure that nothing and no one ever replaces it. This is the greatest risk, precisely because being the most difficult thing, it is also the one that people prefer to delegate, consciously or unconsciously. Those who want to sell easy myths, cheap progress, holy wars or self-proclaimed social policies aim at such a weakness. They will want to tell you what is beautiful and what is ugly, what is better and what is worse, whom to follow and whom to avoid. Always doubt the judgment of others, even when it is honest, because there is nothing more precious or any loss greater than this faculty. Cultivate doubt, a discreet and elegant companion, not as a destructive protest, but as the principle of a new search. Question your own goals and those of others and change perspective, but remember that these are not ends, but rather tools to reach further results.
It is only thanks to them that you can build an effective and solid morality, which in turn must serve to corroborate your judgment, like in a dynamic and continuous game. It is difficult to indicate a specific place or way to learn such an art; in fact, it is impossible. What is certain is that besides a natural predisposition, your teachers will be important, though unfortunately they will depend on you only to a minimal extent. You will only be able to judge if they are up to their task, and your purpose will be the yardstick with which you must evaluate them. Know that there is no notion they can teach you with such an objective that can replace the example they will provide. Because the capacity for judgment is not made of techniques and calculations, since it is precisely what is needed to choose where calculations and methods no longer reach, whether due to the limitedness of knowledge or the indeterminacy of things themselves, and because the capacity for judgment is what makes you human. Seek then knowledge as much as you can, whatever type it may be and according to your most genuine inclinations, and always find in it your humanity, which reveals itself in your judgment; without which nothing from that banquet will ever have any flavor.
I add nothing more, except to wish that one day, in a distant future, when you might have completely forgotten these few words, and when perhaps it will be your turn to face the arduous mandate of indicating to your grandchildren which horizons to follow, even then, that sign may remain with you, invisible and mute, never faded or extinguished, which alone will have guaranteed you human dignity.
